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The F Word

  • Ginn Fourie & Letlapa Mphahlele
    Drawing together voices from South Africa, Romania, Ukraine, Israel, Palestine, Northern Ireland and England, “The F Word – Images of Forgiveness” explores and celebrates the stories of people who have survived tragedy, lived through atrocity and who have found it in themselves to forgive. The visionary behind this is Marina Cantacuzino, a British journalist who founded The Forgiveness Project as a brave new initiative in the fields of conflict resolution and victim support. The project saw her set out on a quest to find people who had emerged from an atrocity without hatred and bitterness.

« A year of writing | Main | Bribery and corruption »

23 February 2009


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Hiya Mandy, I just stumbled upon this post now. I think there is a difference between people with borderline personality disorder and psychopaths, but I am not 100% sure. I have a few family members with borderline personality disorder. What seems to be the defining characteristic of psychopaths is a lack of conscience, and lack of guilt.

Whereas my experience of people with Borderline is that the areas of their brain dealing with pain and anger are not working properly. They have very painful experiences with relationships because tiny things that you or I could not even imagine cause them this intense and uncontrollable pain, which often translates to terrifying rages and irrational behaviour. They are often in terrible debilitating pain, but it is almost impossible for normal people to empathise, because those things would not cause us pain. Borderline people often do seemingly terrible things to other people which seem justified to them because of the pain they are in.

Another difference between borderliners and psychopaths is that most people diagnosed with borderline are women. Borderliners tend to self-harm to release some of their pain and are often suicidal. I am not sure about the stats on these things for psychopaths.

Mandy de Waal

Hey Christina. That sounds really scary. From what I have heard from the experts, the best thing is to just get out the way. It's not worth the trauma.


I work with supposedly for a woman who fits the bill perfectly...I am supposed to be her assistant, training to replace her one day. However, recently I had to suffer through listening to 90 minutes of complete and total lies about me and my work habits/product/ethics...At first - this was difficult to do because I promised I wouldn't interrupt her. And then, after discerning 99.999% of everything she said was complete fantasy, it became easier. How on earth does one defend one's self with twisted inaccurate malicious lies? In front of the "big" boss to boot? I kept silent the entire time, and when asked for my input at the end, I simply praised her (the liar) for all she knows about the industry and thanked her for sharing. What else could I do? Good grief, I love the place I work at, it amazes me she has lasted for 9 years, but I am definitely looking for another job. She is dangerous.

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    My fiction, essays, poetry & short stories.